"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
