I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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