Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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