He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
