Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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