i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Randomize
