I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
