You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
