you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
