my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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