the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
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