I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
