I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
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