I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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