i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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