But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize