69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
i out mim tonsoeep
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