I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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