Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
