I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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