boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
false alarm, still single
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
