why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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