We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
How many fucks given?
0.12846
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
