Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
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