I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
