At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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