I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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