His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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