i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
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