You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
