Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
