fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
