i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Randomize
