Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Randomize
