i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
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