Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
It's just like the Real World with babies
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
