HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
