Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
