this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
