She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
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