She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
