Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
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