i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
