Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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