you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize