my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
false alarm. still invincible.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
