My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
