Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Randomize
