I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Randomize