i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Randomize
