Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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