all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
