someone get that fucking seahorse.
Someone shit on the floor
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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